Holden has been so sweet through this pregnancy. He is so attentive and wants to take care of his mom. He seems to be really excited about the baby. When it is time to do my kick counts for the evening, I always go to my bedroom and watch a little TV...a little me time to focus on the baby. So far, the baby has been giving me 10 kicks in about 15 minutes so the down time is short lived. The last two nights, Holden has been joining me. He comes in and asks if there is anything he can get me like food or a drink. Then he will lay down beside me and ask me what kick "we" are on. He asks how long I have been counting...and usually rubs my belly or my arms. He is just too sweet sometimes. He is very serious and satisfied when I get to number 10. He knows that means baby is doing good. I have asked him many times if he is scared that something will happen to the baby and he always says "No." He just tells me he misses Beckett and wishes all four kids could be together. (Me too).

The kids are off school all week so they have had to run to appointments/errands with me. Today we saw my regular OB. We waited for nearly an hour. When we finally got to see her she told me she had 35 patients this morning. They were all supposed to be tummy checks but that was not so. I have a feeling some families got some horrible news today. It is just so sad that SO many families do not get the happy outcome they envision. It is devastating and my heart aches for each one of them. It is not fair. No one should have to come to terms with loosing their child/ren.

The appointment went good. Baby is measuring right on. Holden must have looked a little irrsistable because I causually stated that he was wishing he could see the baby but I had to tell him he'd have to settle for a heartbeat. My doctor told him she'd let him get a peek at the baby. She rolled in the ultrasound and we got a peek. She explained everything to him and printed him a picture. There is definitely a difference in resolution! I could barely make out anything except for the heart. I am at 32 weeks this Friday...yeah...just 5 more weeks to go, hopefully. From here on out I will be seen 2 times per week. I will be doing non-stress test 2 days per week and a doctor visit once. I just hope and pray that this will go smoothly and they will catch anything that might seem suspicious. I know they can't work miracles...there is only so much they can do and I can do...I just need to leave the rest up to God.

October 17th was supposed to be Beck's birthday. Hard to believe we would have had a one year old, little boy running around here. This was not planned to coincide with the date, but Cory and I are getting out of town for a day. We are just going to get away and relax, just the two of us. We are really looking forward to this alone time before (hopefully) baby comes. It is supposed to be a beautiful weekend and we are staying at a hotel with a beautiful lake view. The kids will be happy as clams at Grandma Karen's house with their cousins. Cha-ching! as Grace would say.