Today is Cory and my 8 year anniversary. Seems like a lot longer than that!:) Maybe because we have been together for 12. Holden figured out that he was pretty much a honeymoon baby last night (totally produced after the wedding). Thank goodness the questions about how you get a baby stopped there. We have been able to skirt the issue so far. He was satisfied with the answer that God decides and then gives you one. After Beckett, he asked the question and that was the answer he got...then he said, "well we better start praying for another one."

This anniversary seems pretty significant considering we have so far weathered the death of our son. It is pretty challenging to survive that kind of trauma. I feel confident looking ahead knowing we can get through tough stuff and still make each other laugh. We are heading out to celebrate tonight. I may even venture to have a non-alcoholic margarita!!!

My aunt and her husband bought 2 garden stones for Beck's garden...I set them in place today. One of them has the same saying as a plaque I bought that sits by Beck's picture. If tears could build a stairway, and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. I think I have cried and continue to cry enough that I'd probably make it there. I am getting a little sick of all the crying, I was never much for tears. I think being pregnant is opening the faucets a little more these days.

I am coming up on an appointment next week. I am very anxious to get there and hear the heartbeat. I am coming down from my high and I can feel the anxiety settling in. I sit quietly sometimes and try to feel the baby move. I thought I had felt something but since I have not felt it again I think it was my mind playing tricks. Of course, I am heading towards 16 weeks so it is unlikely that I should feel it flutter around yet. It is hard to believe I am days short of 4 months. It seems the fist 8 weeks took FOREVER. Now things seem to have sped up a little.

Happy Anniversary Cory! I love you and am looking forward to dinner tonight:)